More Drugs Found on White House Lawn

WASHINGTON, DC — Secret Service officers came across an elaborate '4:20' setup Friday morning on the White House Lawn just days before incoming President Donald Trump is set to take office. Trump took to Truth Social, calling the stunt the work of "deep state stoners." Over a year ago, President Joe Biden pardoned some simple possession offenses and rescheduled the drug from Schedule 1—Heroin and Cocaine to Schedule 3, which includes Tylenol and Codeine. While still illegal on the federal level, rescheduling did help weed businesses secure things like banking and tax breaks. Still, Evan Cohen of the DC-based NORML, a weed reform advocacy group, believes the '4:20' stunt could help sway traditionally staunch anti-drug Republicans to legalize weed during Trump's term. "It's crazy to think, but the thing is," says Cohen, "Joe Rogan is now a Trump Supporter and huge weed aficionado. He had Musk, essentially the shadow President, smoking a joint on his Podcast. Everyone wants to kiss the ring of the oligarch for fear of being primaried. Being the establishment is contrary to this newfound weirdo right-wing counterculture, for lack of a better word. But hey, however, we get there, we get there, man. That's what my old hitchhiker friend Ron used to say. Rest in peace, Ronnie."